Oh, for sure, we live amidst the war torn scars of the original “Civil War” out here. Nevertheless we are comfortably removed from the ones that crash and thunder on still, less than one hundred miles away in our nation’s capitol.
But isn’t there a better way than to bully our ways to success and burn the other guy, as we go, in this great country of our’s?
However, by the time the concession and acceptance speeches were done and I had rested my head on my pillow for the night, awakening vaguely refreshed, I began to hear the silent scream inside my head shrieking that I be liberated from the bondage I felt from this almost ceaseless, dirty campaign election ordeal.
I knew these power players, well, in the life I left behind, decades ago when I chose the path of my higher education and a career as a psychotherapist. Setting myself up in private practice on the outer fringes of the D.C. metropolitan area, I had not yet been ready, then, however, until decades later to leave it all behind for these beautiful mountains.
Susan is of a different ilk than I. She likes best for her body, mind and spirit to stay on the ethereal plane. I, on the other hand, am strongly pulled to get down and dirty in the muddy game of dancing with the dark side before cleaning myself off for ascension, inclined to, also, dig down deep into the dirt as it surrounds me while I make my climb, if I believe the gain will be worth the pain.
Yet here I was the morning after feeling completely victimized by it all. Obviously I had been in it, not only of it.
Had I betrayed myself and my values while dear Susan kept herself clean and tidy? If so, always open to the teachable moment as I am, I asked myself, where had I erred as I made my way, personally, through these heated, last days of Election, 2012, feeling powerfully impacted by them?
But, oh, there is so much more to my story on dancing with the dark side, Washington, D.C. style; lessons learned all the way back to my original flight from D.C., then Watergate, along with many other stories I have kept private until now, always believing, however, that somehow, the time would come when the lessons I’ve learned, the darkness transformed, at least in myself, would someday find use in the public domain. Maybe that time is now. I would certainly feel liberated, if this were so.
This is a faith that has come out of being down in dirt and the endless washing away and more washing that has come of being all muddy with others and then that liberating clearing that can come after; a belief in the capacity for purposeful human transformation, from the worst to the best. Not everyone is inclined to play in the mud of this game as a way to get clean.
Apparently, for me, the gain was, perhaps, worth the pain. Still I am “desperately seeking Susan.”
The morning after; a brave new, beautiful world?