Thursday, December 28, 2017
Please check out my article --
“Forgiveness: The Gift We Give Ourselves”
(Link from cover to "The Importance of Forgiveness" or go to page 18)
By Anastasia Rosen-Jones as published in …
Frederick’s Child Magazine
(Link from cover to "The Importance of Forgiveness" or go to page 18)
Courtesy of Frederick’s Child Magazine
Also posted here --
As The Year Ends, Considering “Forgiveness: The Gift We Give Ourselves”
Saturday, December 23, 2017
Of course I cannot know what is going on in your office or workplace or home. Any more than you can know what is going on in mine. But I can tell you this -- while I am continuing, as usual, getting ready for the holidays and the start of the new year, there must be an added alert, along with the ordinary.
So the other day, while I was digging in to some unexpected corners, here and there, intent on clearing away the clutter of my life, preparing myself for a cleaner 2018, a set of files I found in a long, stored-way drawer, jumped out at me, in a most startling way.
Lo and behold, I had unearthed, most unexpectedly, a HUGE cache of clinical training notes and correspondence having to do with some serious power-abuse of me by a former trainer and supervisor, with an added touch of sexual harassment.
I had been bypassing the whole of it, in my conscious mind for decades!
You could almost call it a workplace, sexual harassment situation, although it wasn’t exactly that. Instead it was more of an academic situation whereby one of my clinical training supervisors had not only oppressed and frightened me, with his power-over me position repeatedly, though I had called him on it and asked him to stop, but had also taken serious, career defeating actions against me for my rebuffs of him.
What had I here?
Startled by my discovery, one of my first thoughts was that what I had found could have taken me down, but it did not!
Thanks to the blatant, once spotlighted, outrageous evil of Harvey Weinstein and the now expanding women's power movement, I thought, almost immediately, that I had unearthed a buried treasure trove; something that, given the current climate, would be likely to hold seeds of another layer; these almost unimaginably -- of transformation and liberation for me!
After a day of cogitation on my findings, I reached out to share my discovery with a dear colleague of mine, known for forty plus years. With this behind me for support, I contacted my professional training and accreditation association.
And, lo and behold, before too many more hours had passed, I had both written and called the highest officials I could find from that particular organization and had begun the process of making an Ethics/Professional Practices complaint.
Can you believe it?
Thank you Harvey Weinstein and women united!
So today I am immersed in preparing full documentation for that professional association which will remain anonymous, for the moment, until further notice.
There is so much to copy, letter after letter of correspondence from a twelve year teacher-student relationship that went south, costing me much professionally; more than I can put a price tag on now.
Going through this stash, I am sometimes in so much pain!
Bottled up grief from things I have been containing, holding it mostly all to myself – for decades. Just as I had done about my child abuse and spousal abuse from my daughter’s father.
I am masterful at containment. Now I hope I am being masterful at RECLAIMING ME!
Still, I am, off and on, in so much pain!
Yet so grateful to be alive at this time of expanding female liberation and equality!
Just look how much freer we are becoming, collectively, day by day, now.
And, for me, personally and professionally, I am so appreciative that out of the pain Anastasia, ME, is getting to rise again in the form of being able to serve my community, in a specialized way that is close to my heart, as I had done in the past, with more knowledge and expertise in how both men and women can move beyond gender tyranny than almost anyone, other than my devoted followers, collected in my close to forty-five years of professionally dealing with male-female sexuality issues, can imagine!
Anastasia, meaning of name --- “She who rises again!”
See New Horizons’ recent press release, "Beyond Gender Tyranny," on the professional angle.
Whoopee, transformation and liberation lie just ahead!
Long time coming!
Labels: Anastasia's Story
Thursday, December 21, 2017
When your survival is being threatened daily by your abuser you learn to keep secrets. You learn to not make any fuss though your life is in jeopardy. The Harvey Weinstein scandals and the #Metoo outpouring is releasing that kind of long-held survival threat and accompanying fear.
|The Cost Of The Quiet|
Stories and stories, untold, are pouring out; mine, no less than yours.
There has been such an enormous cost to the quiet. And, yet on my end, as no doubt for many others, the liberation is here. But freedom does not come easily.
In the past month I have kept relatively quiet. I had little to say, at least publicly.
So much was incubating inside of me, as I heard and watched account after account of #MeToo stories come alive in the daily media and on the internet, I could not speak, except to those closest to me. I had almost no words; only memories, emotions and insights, born of dots, long overlooked, connecting.
Today, however, the lid is off, the bottle uncorked for the genie in me to fly free though I am not yet adept at flight.
I think, as I often do, I may write my way through the holidays. I believe I am beginning now.
Perhaps it is the Winter Solstice that is bringing this out of me now. The Winter Solstice has special significance for me, as my only son was born on the Winter Solstice; a child of an Jewish-Christian interfaith mixed marriage he was, also, born on the first night of Chanukah and came home from the hospital on Christmas Eve with a bright moon shining although not quite full.
He is my star child though by him, too, I am being punished for whistle blowing the family abuse secrets; sexual and otherwise.
This year, that punishing seems to be more vivid to my conscious mind, yet held in greater peace than, possibly, ever before.
Much, much, much more to come from Anastasia The Storyteller
Tuesday, December 12, 2017
The New Horizons Small “Zones of Peace” Project presents –
(Scroll down beyond seminar announcement to read New Horizons Small "Zones of Peace" press release.)
The Wise Woman’s Way Out of #MeToo:
A One-Day Seminar
|New Horizons, circa 1998:|
the month before Anastasia lost her eyesight.
(Notice that this seminar is one of New Horizons’ efforts to help bring Executive Director and Founder, Anastasia Rosen-Jones, The Storyteller, into the Light.)
Read Anastasia’s #MeToo stories here.
And about her amazing background that uniquely equips her to address current gender challenges here.
Also, hear Anastasia on Anastasia The Storyteller on Blog Talk Radio
OMG! What a time this is to be a woman – and make the most of our womanly strengths. Sharing our stories is one of our best ways to affirm our powers and help make our dreams come true.
That’s what this one day seminar is about -- you and I, our stories and reclaiming our dreams!
The Wise Woman’s Way Out of #MeToo:
A One-Day Seminar
From storytelling – and story “listening,” we gain insight, inspiration, connection, new found levels of wisdom and creative solutions to problems that we face. There has been such a “Cost to the quiet” of holding the secrets we carried out of shame and fear. Now is the time to let them go! In this lies our woman-power and our shared futures.
Hear Anastasia’s amazing and inspiring story of a journey from sexually abused woman to High Priestess, with guidelines to get yourself there too – or anywhere else you wish to be!
Your opportunity to share your #MeToo Stories, hear the stories of other women and begin creating a new pathway for yourself out of the #MeToo trap.
Saturday, Rescheduled, New Date TBA
10:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m.
Frederick Friends Meeting House
723 N. Market Street Frederick, Maryland 21701
Reserve early, space will be limited!
Tax deductible donation: Early registration -- $25 prior to tba, 2018
$35 – tba, $50 at the door.
No one stays away because of $$$, inquire about scholarships and gifts in kind donations.
New Horizons is a 501 C 3 non-profit educational organization
For Details and Reservations, Contact: Anastasia Rosen-Jones
Email: HarpersFerryNH@aol.com Cell: 240.409.5347
Be sure to read New Horizons Small “Zones of Peace” articles on Bridging The Gender Gap and other topics.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
December 12, 2017
New Horizons Pledges Development Of County-Wide Gender Gap Bridge-Building Support Network
The New Horizons “Small Zones Of Peace” Project, known throughout Frederick County for its bridge-building, “Coffee House Conversations” efforts in the areas of race and citizen-police relations, has announced plans to update its city-wide support network approach.
From the mid-1980s to the early 21st century, New Horizons sponsored a full-fledged, highly successful, city- wide, support network program, addressing male female relationship problems primarily. With ongoing support groups in Montgomery, Prince Georges and Frederick Counties and Northern Virginia—boosted by day-long educational seminars, monthly training, and weekend retreats—the project became a mainstay for both men and women facing the kinds of gender imbalance challenges presently filling our daily news cycles by way of Hollywood-to-New York (and points in between) sexual harassment scandals.
In response to this outpouring, the New Horizons “Small Zones of Peace” Project, headed by Executive Director and Founder Anastasia Rosen-Jones, is now pledging to revitalize its support network model for Frederick County. To this end, the organization will seek:
- Collaboration with other organizations, groups, agencies and individuals to help develop a Frederick County Male-Female Support Network;
- To develop a feasibility study to chart out strategies for the project; and
- To bring together the many voices of our community that have gender-based, power imbalance concerns.
Ms. Rosen-Jones, who is a member of the Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) workgroup, a project of the Frederick County Health Department’s Local Health Improvement Plan (LHIP)—an effort including, too, Frederick County United Way, the Frederick County Mental Health Association, and other local agencies and organizations—states:
“There is a strong correlation between what we do as ACE activists and what New Horizons is proposing here. Recent trends reporting on sex and power-related problems in the workplace, as well as elsewhere, reveal that the main victims appear to be women and mothers.
With secrets buried deep within, these adult victims, who may have never thought—previously—to seek help, find themselves rearing children while burdened with unhealed traumas that can impact their young ones. As it is ACE’s task to assist children and families experiencing adverse conditions, we may also find community benefit in support and guidance to these male and female survivors in ways beyond current provisions and outside of immediate domestic violence crisis intervention services. This is what our support network will be designed to accomplish."
New Horizons Support Network, Inc. is a non-profit organization that offers programs designed to teach interpersonal and community development skills and strategies through the model of its “Small Zones of Peace” Project initiative. Information about the organization can be found here.
Also, read Ms. Rosen-Jones’ bio where information on Anastasia’s women’s studies research and on the intersection of the co-dependent (i.e. passive addict/co-dependent) and the aggressive/power addict can also be found.
Saturday, November 18, 2017
Reflections on the Harvey Weinstein/Hollywood drama and its fallout
Times like these, for long term feminists like myself, beg action and reflection. Neither, alone, accomplishes the task of what is needed for the endless journey home to the center of oneself -- and how one might, correspondingly, contribute to the world around oneself.
One of the essential values I inherited from my Jewish foundations underscores the dual demands of times like these; tikkun atzmi – repair of the self, tikkun olam – world repair.
Never are these two to be separated.
Because I am made of this, I seek to, somehow, contribute something meaningful to help heal the daily outpourings of distress while, simultaneously, I explore the damaging experiences I have had with men, in my personal life. As a result, these days, I find myself ceaselessly searching my heart and mind to heal within, yet, seeking to find my particular lane to contribute what I can that I might, in time, provide to help foster progress out of this angst.
In this distress, at what I see around me, and inside myself, soulful contemplation comforts me, as I attempt to find order in all the chaos.
Searching for answers, I ask myself --
What does this near ceaseless confronting of men in power and their abuse thereof, these days, for their history of sexual abuse and harassment, mean for my life? What is mine to do, here, to help this outpouring that I have, like an Olympic contender, practiced, my whole life, to manage, personally and professionally?
What does this attack on the individual abusers and a system that has sustained them, even promoted and enabled them, mean for me today? And tomorrow? How can I help this male power-abuse and societal dysfunction that could be righted?
I know it can be corrected! On a small scale I have seen situations like this be reconciled, again and again, if not perfectly, at least with significant progress, even in my own life; a tale or two I will get to in time.
We are awash in one HUGE co-dependency game, on as grand a scale as one can imagine!
There are solutions -- and millions of people, like myself, who have either the skills or the personal experience, or both, to help make repairs.
But this is not a solo endeavor. It is a totally collective endeavor. A dysfunctional system, of many interlocking pieces, got us here. The same can get us out.
If we are willing to work at it.
We must ask ourselves, who are the ones ready, willing and able to take up the task of the fixing?
I, for one, along with many others, am in for the ride. But it will be a long one. And, we must ask that each and every one of us pay heed to what we have contributed to the problems we are now uprooting –- and get on board with whatever it is we need to do differently.
Finger pointing at others is not going to do it, wholly. And, trust me, if you don’t already know it, fierceness, alone, will not be enough!
For myself I realize that with all my wondering what to do, what to do, my fierce determination to “do” is not sufficient. I must take time, as must we all, to go inside myself – and – just simply “BE. Unhook from the urgency that drives me to act. Find the stillness inside. And, with that find my true way here.
So, in contemplation, I ponder, wondering –
If I am to adjust my world view, once again, for this new normal that includes a mindfulness, not only of the depravity of our president, but also of the many other bastions of female oppression that make up male-dominated organizations and businesses, what can I do with this that can contribute to the good of the whole; the altruistic way that sits in the center of me; all for one, one for all? I will seek and I will find, in good time when all is not so heavy as it is today.
In silence, it also comes to me to wonder, OMG, what about the supporting players; accomplices in the invasion of female dignity, safety and security? What to do about them?
I am back in the doing again, I see. So much is stirred it is hard to just let it be.
Here I consider that I must look and see, contemplate and consider, what to do? What to do?
So much is uprooted, how can we even begin to rebuild? Am I really ready to rebuild now, or is it still time to pause and reflect.
For example, how I am to even look upon the hidden oppression of women, rampant throughout society, troubles me, especially when even NPR is now pressed to reveal – and – take action upon, the cracks in what had seemed to be a well-balanced, female empowering organization?
Then what to do with that?
Truly nothing is as it seemed before!
But there are meaningful things to do with all of this that is rocking us now.
Our whole society, it seems, is in need of repair! Where do we start?
Obviously speaking truth to power is where it begins.
Then, what next? This is not enough!
I remember how upending it was for me when Richard Nixon was, finally, known to be fully culpable as the power behind the Watergate break-in. There again our country was in chaos.
It threw me down on the ground – and – most of those around me, in my age group, in terms of the world view we had been holding. What could it possibly mean that our president, JFK, a revered civic leader, Martin Luther King, Jr. and then Bobby Kennedy, had all been assassinated? And that our current president, Richard Nixon, had seriously lied to the American people?
How was one to make sense of this chaos in the world order we had known?
Were we to now discard the lessons of our growing up that had included yearly, big deal celebrations of the birthdays of George Washington and Abraham Lincoln, our pillars of leadership and what our country had always stood for? Or so we believed.
The darkness that has now been revealed disturbs me, while at the same time it casts a reaffirming light on what was readily intuited, if one took the time to consider the underpinnings of much that glittered but was not truly gold. Tinsel town had never been anything but façade. But what about NPR?
Everyday more dirt is unearthed, as the top, heavy with male dominance structures, shows its corrosive edges. I am disturbed and the conversations around me, focusing on this upheaval, are without end.
Much has been stored away in the body, mind and spirit of so many women, toxic and festering as secrets are liable to be.
But it is not only the harm, injury and trauma of the women, who like myself, albeit not professionally, have been victimized by male sexual dominance and abuse, I am concerned about our country, the women – and— the men in it and how we are going to put ourselves aright again.
I cringe at some of the revelations I see and read about while I celebrate the upheaval.
It needed to be and was, in fact, long overdue.
I particularly applaud the cleverness of women like Ashley Judd. I believe they knew full well that while they could have no direct impact on Donald Trump, they could, instead topple Harvey Weinstein.
But where do we go from here to set things aright?
Speaking truth to power is not enough.
Using our collective women power to stand up, speak out, join the chorus and the newest women’s empowerment movement, #Metoo, is, also, not enough in my book.
The heartrending story of Aly Raisman and the other young women who were violated by that merchant of evil, Dr. Larry Nassar, hurts my very soul, every time I think of it.
Of all the stories that have come to light since the Harvey Weinstein/Hollywood scandal was unleashed, thanks to Ronan Farrow, the New Yorker and the NYT, young women, like Aly Raisman, Olympic Gold Medalist in gymnastics, being sexually assaulted by their physician, strikes me hardest; a mere child, an innocent. Though this issue had been exposed earlier, somehow, added to the others, it has taken on added impact.
How could this have been? Right under our very eyes? And, at a time when the athletic stars of these young women were burning most brightly.
And, yet “Fierce” as a title for Ms. Raisman’s new book, out this past week and discussed almost everywhere, hit a button of concern for me.
While I admire the strength and determination demanded of an Olympic contender. And, I feel great compassion for the “fierceness” it must have taken for Ms. Raisman – and – others to manage the sexual abuse by the hands Dr. Nassar, known as “the” top physician for athletes, when I sink my body, mind and spirit down into the significance of this “fierceness” on a day-to-day, long-term basis, I can’t help but feel a bit of trepidation.
Not only on behalf of Ms. Raisman, but also just the simple notion of fierceness, in general, as it relates to a show of courage and fortitude, such as is now being displayed by the women of Hollywood who have come forth; women who will now, not allow the aura of Tinsel Town or Olympic Gold, or ordinary life to diminish them.
As I know it, both as a psychotherapist, as well as a life-long researcher of the Dark Side, fierceness, in some ways, needs to be considered as a double edge sword.
On one hand, fierceness, derived from our innate survival response, allows us to do just what it is intended to do, survive. Its importance in providing the individual with life-saving strength in the face of mortal threat, body, mind or spirit, makes it one of humanity’s greatest resources.
However, fierceness, if examined closely and understood with its many facets of operation, can, if held too long, become the seat of doing oneself in. Its every day, next pathway of expression is anger, resentment, unhealed emotional wounds and fears; toxic stress chemicals that compromise the body as well as emotions.
The action required for these is oftentimes no action at all, other than that which comes of solitude, quiet reflection, contemplation. This is the work of tikkun atzmi, self-repair. This is not done in the light of the media, talk shows or grand conferences. This is the inner work
that must be pursued on one’s own.
Nancy Smith, licensed acupuncturist, Somatic Experiencing Practitioner and former registered nurse who has been my acupuncturist, now, for more than half-a-dozen years describes the phenomenon of being “stuck on” (i.e. engaged in non-stop action as well as inner stress), drawing on the teachings of one of her mentors, Peter A. Levine, author of Waking The Tiger, explains the phenomenon of “getting stuck on” as a kind of emotional overdrive, based on instinctual survival coping defenses that eventually outweigh their usefulness.
Eloquently, Nancy translates the inner balancing process needed, to offset our fierceness, with these words –
The storms of summer give way to the damp heaviness of late summer. Then the deep letting go of the autumn. So, as a person tracks the weather inside, she can sense the stuck places. And allow them to transform as they move through the body and into awareness.When the fury dies down and surely it will, both that prompted by external experiences and then correspondingly internally, we need to learn how to bring ourselves back into an inner steadiness, body, mind and spirit. Find out more about Nancy, my favorite acupuncturist who has aided my inner balancing with her hands on knowing here.
Fierceness then must seek a mellower channel. On its own, the hype of the internet reports, Facebook chats, conferences and marches of protest keep things hyped. This we must manage and not allow the excitement of our new women’s liberation to take its toll while we are after our full freedom.
For our best interest, we, thus, must come to realize that “fierceness is not enough.”
When we think of survival-driven behaviors, we can view them along a continuum from the extreme of a Loser Survivor to the opposite extreme of the Winner Survivor. The Loser Survivor is an addict, power, sex or otherwise. The Winner Survivor seeks and finds balance, without and within.
See the Paradigm For Winners and Losers
Thursday, November 16, 2017
How the Harvey Weinstein/Hollywood scandal fallout can be a long-ranging opportunity
I took a risk a few days ago, with a male friend of mine, deciding to share an experience I had had of sexual harassment a number of years ago.
As we were discussing the fallout of the Harvey Weinstein/Hollywood scandals the other evening and its impact on our personal lives, I thought I'd give it a try to be a bit more forthcoming than usual on this subject that is all abuzz these days; male sexual dominance, harassment and abuse -- and -- related issues.
Unfortunately, it took only a few sentences of exchange for me to discover that my friend’s level of compassionate listening and understanding could rapidly send me back into the private hidey hole where this one story of mine, and others like it, has generally been held in secret, for decades.
In this one area, the conversation was a disaster. However, given the assurance I had, based on past experience, that this particular male has an overall respect for me, as a professional and as a friend, he and I are about to turn the sour lemons of that discussion into lemonade, or so we hope!
At least we are planning to give it a try, with a lengthy, serious attempt scheduled for my telling my story to him, with him taking up the task of doing his level best to be a compassionate listener.
Here is an example of how the Harvey Weinstein/Hollywood scandal fallout can be a long-ranging opportunity.
(If you want to give this “storytelling,” story “listening” idea a try – and – aren’t quite sure how to proceed, follow my updates on how we are doing it on this end. Or, contact me, directly, to engage my coaching talents for yourself, personally. Contact details at end of this post.)
The man in question has been a participant in numerous New Horizons community-building conversation programs, over the past few years. And, recently, he attended the launching of our Storytelling Workshop Series. He is, also, now on the New Horizons Board of Directors. In these programs and our various other community development events and projects, he has demonstrated some of the qualities I appreciate most in a man; humbleness and an openness to learning.
Almost unbeatable qualities in fact, in my book! And, so I trust him!
So here we go with a planned, quiet time set aside for this coming Saturday afternoon, weather permitting. “Weather permitting” is that I have been promised a respectable contribution from him, with the aid of his trusty chain saw, to help build up my wood pile in exchange for my time, coaching him through our planned exchange to develop some much needed listening skills for use with his partner.
Sean, as I will call him, has definitely been a good student, a conscientious participant and volunteer in all things New Horizons, showing marked improvement in his active listening and story "listening" skills from where he was a year ago. From this I have high hopes for our endeavor.
Even more fortunately, the good will this gentleman and I have established, over the time we have known one another, has built us both some equity in this thing we call our friendship.
To add importance to our plan for our dialogue, Sean and I each have personal objectives to add to our general intentions for this little experiment we are endeavoring to pursue.
On Sean’s end, he is being challenged by his engagement to a woman who has been raped numerous times. And his skill level for discussing such a sensitive and highly charged topic as sexual harassment and abuse with her, while fairly atrocious with me the other evening, is constantly brewing danger in terms of building health into this relationship of his.
So, I am quite the right woman for him to practice on for improving these much-needed skills of his.
My goals for our experiment are three-fold, and possibly more. For starters, I want to experience how New Horizons might best utilize storytelling to bridge the gender gap for other women and men, especially at this crucial time. Secondly, my spontaneous sharing with Sean, the other evening, up against all the scandals coming out of Hollywood and beyond, made me realize that I have rarely shared the all too many stories I am harboring about sexual harassment and abuse experiences in my personal life.
On those occasions that I did, it was only with another woman or a therapist.
This is making me realize that the Cost of the Quiet in my life on these issues has continued to take a toll I hadn’t recognized, given that I had shared some. But, clearly, not anywhere near enough to completely free me from the damage these experiences bring into a woman’s life. Liberation is, thus, my third objective for the talk Sean and I are planning.
Sean and I, too, are hoping that in our elevating ourselves, personally, through our forthcoming conversation, we’ll, all being well, uplift as well, other of our male-female relationships. And possibly, light a path, by example, for other women and men who might be wondering, these days, how to bridge the divide that seems to be widening, considerably, the gender gap.
If now is not the time to give this holding of secrets up, I can’t imagine when else might be!
So I am choosing, as many other women are, obviously now doing, to let my secrets go, in the service of a new found freedom.
For both Sean and myself, the encouragement men are now getting is that for them, too, a new candor might await, out of talking to the women in their lives about these long-hidden incidents and issues.
I picked up on the internet the other day, the words of Gillian Thomas, a senior staff attorney for the American Civil Liberties Union Women's Rights Project --
"One of the many positive outcomes of the #MeToo campaign over the last week "is men of all ages realizing the ubiquity of this issue and going the next step further by asking the women in their lives, 'Has this happened to you, what happened?'This reaching out, if it includes respecting a woman’s right to not share, can carry a message of --
“Please tell me your story. I want to listen and learn from your distress. In this way, perhaps we can help make change.
This is my commitment to you, and other women, to be a better man.”In Sean’s case, for example, I am going to be encouraging him to reach out to his fiancée, saying something like this, to get a dialogue started –
Dear One, I know that the kind of things being revealed by the Harvey Weinstein/Hollywood scandals have happened to you. Please tell me about it, again. This time, not like the last, I will listen carefully to you, with as much compassion and understanding as I can.
I might not do this so well, at first. But if you give me a chance, I want to be a part of your healing from these past violations. And, I am going to do my level best to learn how.
Please tell me your story. Please tell me as many stories as you wish so I can support you and learn to be the best partner I can be for you.This is one way that the Harvey Weinstein/Hollywood scandal fallout can be a long-ranging opportunity for both women and men.
For storytelling and story “listening" coaching,
Contact: Anastasia Rosen-Jones
Email: SuperSleuthDSW@aol.com Cell: 240.409.5347
Monday, November 6, 2017
More unfolding, on this end, from the Harvey Weinstein fallout
A New York Times article titled, The ‘Click’ Moment: How the Weinstein Scandal Unleashed a Tsunami, calls attention to a Mss Magazine edition that put sexual harassment in the workplace on its front cover, forty years ago, this month.
Where were you when this article – and – the ones that accompanied it were published?
Were you still in diapers, or possibly an unborn?
Or were you, like myself, already an active part of the movement to liberate women that has been going on for well over a hundred years; the movement of women fighting the good fight for the respect and dignity we all deserve?
|Wow! What a brew |
have we here!
Where was I?
I was deep into teaching women to honor their bodies through my first workshop series titled “Scripts, Sexuality and Self.”
For close to twenty-five years I continued on with variations of this program, often doing weekend intensives at beach and mountain locations. Whenever and wherever I could bring women together to help empower and support them.
And help them draw support from one another; something almost none of them had ever done before; women as a sisterhood was something that just wasn’t done at the time.
Even when I did my last weekend retreat in 1998, right before I lost my eyesight.
With more than forty years experience under my belt, helping to empower women, as you can imagine, I have much to throw into the ring these days, as we, as a society, seek to find our way through the chaos of women being sexually harassed, used and abused -- and -- finally the dirty deeds now being seriously discussed.
I have so much to offer on this issue to help it resolve. But I am world weary today from all the heavy-lifting, working to free my own body, mind and spirit from all that has been being bypassed, now, for decades, that is being uprooted personally, on this issue.
So I think this is enough for today. It is not so simple, these days, to just sit down and produce an article. There is so much to assimilate. So much to contemplate on how to best move forward through these challenging times. On my end heavy, heavy lifting!
It does look, however, as if we are heading for a long-desired destination; “winning in the battle of the sexes,” a greater peace now on the horizon.
But lots of work to be done to get to this place of potential awe.
Long time coming!
Thursday, November 2, 2017
The Battle Between The Light And Dark Sides of Humanity: Showing Now At Your Local Theatre, And Everywhere Else You Go!
Are we now at a time of an important showdown in our human evolution? The evolution of humanity is what it’s, ultimately, all about, day in and day out, in this life we live.
Are the Dark and Light sides of both society and politics, as shown on the big screen of American life, now coming out of Hollywood, Washington and, especially, the Oval Office, literally and symbolically, putting the battle of the sexes, and the power dynamics of the elite, on view, as a serious platform for cultural change – and for the evolution of the person?
Harvey Weinstein, Hollywood and its fallout -- and -- Trump and Mueller in Washington have cornered the market, for the latest war of the worlds, in real time. In this case the battle between the feminine and the masculine, the Dark and the Light, as big as Star Wars, that we might see just how this is going.
If so, what do we do with it all?
And, from this, afford ourselves the related chance to raise up from our baser selves to our Higher Selves.
But will we, individually and collectively, take the opportunity?
If we get up high enough to take that metaphorical helicopter view of what is now happening down here on the earth plane, we might see, as the helicopter view urges that –
“When something is distressing us, we’re so close to it, involved with it, part of it – it’s really hard to stand back from what’s happening. We see the close up view, but we can’t see anything else. It’s like the well-known saying: “We can’t see the wood for the trees”. If we could zoom out our view, like a helicopter hovering above, we’d be able to see the bigger picture. We could stand back, be less emotionally involved, and see a different perspective.If we achieve this distance, even briefly, what do we see? And, what do we do, with what we see?
Many voices have been coming out of once quiet places, since the Weinstein incident began almost a month ago.
In a circumstance, such as this, there are, generally, three main options of how to proceed; win or learn are the two best. Then shoving a circumstance back under the rug from whence it came, appears at the tail end, as the losers way to go.
The present battle that has now originated out of Hollywood, in what is actually an ongoing war, is based on courageous women coming forth, speaking truths; many of which have been held, bottled up, for decades. If we look at what’s happening we can almost see, from the high up distance that what is now going on in this battle of the sexes has the elements of a showdown, like Luke Skywalker facing Darth Vadar; good and evil meet head to head.
The Force has been disturbed for months. And, many are saying that what we are now seeing out of Hollywood is, part and parcel, a reaction to Donald Trump’s election to the Oval Office.
Could this be true? If so what can that actually mean for the long term?
Now that the women of Hollywood and beyond are feeling empowered by the impact to take Harvey Weinstein down and a good many others with him, with their collective voices, hearts and souls, joined by feminist-leaning males, what next?
Will the Forces of Light,in fact, be able to subdue those of the Dark?
In ways that Anita Hill, Gloria Steinam, Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg and the many others have fought for eons to achieve; the almost impossible dream?
Labels: Society and Politics
Sunday, October 29, 2017
My continuing series on the Harvey Weinstein scandal and its fallout.
This morning, as I am coming into the day, I am reflecting on the notion of wholeness and the cost one pays for fragmenting or fracturing oneself from that completeness.
With this, in mind, the words of “Alfie," the song, ring through my mind.
Is it just for the moment we live?
What’s it all about when you sort it out, Alfie?Also with this I am remembering how impacted I had been by the suicide of L. Wren Scott.
For months after I carried the fact of her death and what could be made of it, for those left behind, in a central part of me.
Looking back my heart and soul must have been fully captured by the situation.
I wrote blog articles about it and did, at least, three radio shows derived from it.
Searching through archives on my computer, I find that that, while L. Wren Scott died on March 7, 2014, I was still compelled to think intently about her death in July of that year.
Read my blog article of July 9, 2014, The Cost Of The Quiet, to see what I mean about how bound up in this incident I was.
I find other blog articles on the death of L. Wren Scott, dating as far back to March 24, 2014 and radios shows, beginning on March 29, continuing forward to July 5, 2014.
Question: Why did this particular death by suicide upset me so much?
Answer: Because whatever was happening for me in the center of Washington’s darkness was bad enough for me to contemplate my own death by suicide.
Today I am giving much thought to this, as I continue, #Metoo, to sort out the deluge coming out of Hollywood from the Harvey Weinstein scandal, trying to regain my own sense of wholeness that feels a bit fragmented these days.
Similarly I had been captured, too, by the murder of Chandra Levy, And I wasn’t even getting sexually harassed or abused, or in an affair with a Congressman!
Here, again, the dominant thought for me, in this situation, was “there by the grace of G-d go I.”
Listen to my stories that directly relate to my Washington fast track life that left me, thinking of suicide and knowing how risky was life in that arena. And, get a hint of my back story throughout the various articles on this site, especially under the label of Hot Pants and Motorcycles.
Interestingly "hints" are all you get when a person is hiding the whole truth; another one of those costs of the quiet. Thus, you will find all kinds of these, related to what I was not saying, scattered throughout this site.
Look to what is coming out, now, from Hollywood, if you have any doubt of that.
Here are three of my stories on my Anastasia The Radio Show –
March 29, 2014 -- There By The Grace of G-d Go I -- A
March 30, 2014 -- There By The Grace of G-d Go I!
July 5, 2014 -- The Cost Of The Quiet
Now think about this, if you will, for the thought for the day, derived from the Harvey Weinstein scandal etc. –
The abuse of power in the hands of the power elite, mostly male, can drive an innocent young woman to her destruction, especially if there is no one with whom she feels safe enough to tell what is happening for her..
In fact -- there is one the most serious costs accompanying the quiet; there is almost no one to tell. So you carry it all by yourself while it eats away at your soul!
Here is an earlier article from October, 2013, that I wrote on this theme of power-over threats, There By The Grace of G-d Go I, long before L. Wren Scott's suicide.
For us naive women, I think it illustrates how power over abuses by men can almost be experienced as akin to same kind of threat as living under Hitler when you get right down to it; a mortal threat!
So what’s been happening in Hollywood to the young women who have been victimized by the power brokers of that system and the culture created?
What has been their cost of the quiet?
We must look hard at this for these particular, victimized women, especially in this day and age of understanding Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome (PTSD) and the effects of Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE).
I grew up in Hollywood from age twelve on. I did not leave it behind until I married at twenty-one. Today I am wondering if knowing Hollywood games, as I watched them growing up, at the side of my father – and seeing the price he paid in that arena, “Big fish in small pond in Ohio, small fish in big pond in Hollywood," aided me in leaving the Washington games to save my soul.
Resilience, we are learning, is what allows an individual to overcome serious survival threats.
The Hollywood women who survived Harvey Weinstein and others like him are incredibly resilient.
And, winner survivors, at that, as they have, not only survived assaults on their person hoods and their livelihood. But they have also done remarkably well in coming through these ordeals as true achievers of the highest brand.
What can we learn here, especially as women, about both the "Cost of The Quiet" and the will to survive, under extreme threat and pressure?
Now, it's all about #Metoo!