As Truth Be Told, It's The Distress Of American Politics That Has Blinded Me!!

And my prayers and determination to help make things better that propels me forward.

Now how do I make this seeming oddity of myself, reoccurring blindness crises directly connected to surrounding circumstances, sound reasonable?

The crisis of "to see or not to see." 

It looms, dramatically, in front of us and all around, if only we would notice it for what it is and take steps to move beyond the denial of things good and healthy, while allowing darkness to envelop our daily lives!

I know I'm not the only one to be so upset, body, mind and spirit, that severe repercussions are resulting.

Here's my version.

I hope my story will invite yours too because we must get ourselves out of this swamp/quicksand Donald Trump is making of our country with his dark side politics of lies and corruption.

Sharing our stories can help us unite and move past the pain we create for ourselves and others by allowing our differences to become insurmountable obstacles to our innate Human Oneness.

Storytelling is one vitally important way to begin so I offer my own.

Yet I write this with trepidation, reminding myself, as an aside, that Thanksgiving is coming fast on the morrow, so gratitude, too, must also be with me – and – it is.

My various apprehensions arise out of my intention, here, to speak of things that touch so definitively on the emotional and spiritually abstract that I seriously doubt my abilities to truly convey what I wish.

The gratitude, of course, is that I seem to be coming through my eye ordeal successfully.

Overall, however, I am weak and shaky these days. But the initial, excruciating pain in my head and the nausea are gone as physical healing and strength rebuilding start to kick in. Yet truth be told there's a great deal more to this eye crisis of mine, the surgical removal of my right eye, than a purely physical health emergency.

The current politics of the U.S.A. is what this recent blindness episode is truly about for me. Our politics are not merely about laws and legalities, people and personalities are active elements here too. They embody emotions and whole personhoods that also are in play.

My eyesight crisis, at this juncture, illustrates this.

I am in pain, body, mind and spirit. Might you be also?

I want you to know what this anguish is wholly about for me, as the significance of my eye crisis emerges, most directly, out of our present political crisis, through to me and then out to you. You, too, cycle through this pattern alongside me, keeping the distress in motion.

Though, on a personal level, my eye crisis is a certain major game changer for me, sharing my story of it is essential too.But how to truly explain it, as I know it, daunts me.

The center of it is that:

My right eye, the one just removed, has been rather a magical eye and in its new form will continue to be, I am certain.

This I know. But how for me to tell you of what is spiritual coupled with the physical, this I do not know. Speaking of the spiritual, especially on the internet is not easily done.

What I’m trying to get across, what I mean by this is that there is every evidence that my right eye can and has predictably demonstrated, over many decades, a unique relationship to psychic abilities I have developed throughout the course of my life that manifest in my skill as a relationship and community development consultant and coach, abilities of mine that are products of stress and distress surmounted or healed

Isn't that amazing?

Can you believe it?

The alchemical conjuring by the whole apparatus that has been my right eye comes of it reacting dramatically, in a very unique way, to certain specific kinds of stressors in my life by going on strike, by cutting off my ability to receive external, earth plane input through it while simultaneously opening my consciousness to taking in  otherworldly data.

The combining of this psychic ability in me with my many years of rock solid skills and experience is what I am most about, added, of course, to my being a truly fine person in the manner Murat guided me to be.

So there, I've said it now!

Can you believe it?

Take it at face value, what I've just stated above?

Discovering this phenomenon in myself has been quite unnerving at times. Thus my consciousness of the dynamic as it was living itself out became a traditional "gradual awakening," a growing awareness, based on cumulative experience and knowledge.

But, oh my goodness! How very strange it has been to accept that my body, with my right eye as the messenger channels information of Divine origins.

So slowly did I "get it" that, at first, I could barely accept the possibility/reality of what my experiences were holding up before me.

Only with a medically-backed perspective did I even begin to trust that scientific data could be at hand to explain some fairly weird eye crisis patterns in me. At a 1978 Johns Hopkins Wilmer Eye Institute appointment, the ophthalmologist diagnosed a series of problems I was having at that time as attributable to a conversion hysteria reaction, hysterical blindness, a major body-mind-spirit stress reaction!

With that event providing the portal, over time I began to accept, with increasing assurance that, indeed, intermittent eye crises, blindness episodes that happened for me repeatedly, many times, over time, were no accident, not isolated incidents, but occurring within a context.

As truth be told, this is the magical tale I wish to speak of now and in the immediate future.

It leads me directly into defining and describing the underpinnings of the newly developing future on hand for New Horizons and myself – and – you too, if you choose to allow your better self to make a direct connection to New Horizons Truth Or Dare Movement: Destination Capitol Hill.

I hope you will want to know of my story as its implications for the necessary healing from what lies ahead for us are noteworthy, as Americans at this time, on a very turbulent path as we usher in 2020.

Right now many of us are in various kinds of anguish over what is happening to our country. But ahead, “G-d willing and the creek don’t rise,” healing is what we will need.

And healing is what we can find, if we are willing to come together and be "united states."

My story is a juicy one. In its depths lie seeds of how we might proceed with this agenda

The challenge is how, especially on the internet my story/stories can be drawn from me with the richness they merit via the internet, enough to invite yours.

We will just need to see how to do it.

Next I will want to share with you the deciphering of the mystery of my recent past ninety days for the illumination they have to offer – the teachable lessons.

But this will give you only a work unfolding, in progress, with more to be excavated, gold to be mined.

Wishing you a Happy Thanksgiving with hopes for even more joyful ones ahead.

Shocking News At New Horizons

FYI

Thursday, November 21, 2019, 2 p.m., 
Johns Hopkins Wilmer Eye Institute Vandann Surgerical Facility
Baltimore, Maryland

Anastasia Rosen-Jones, Beloved Executive Director, New Horizons Support Network, Inc. underwent emergency surgical removal of her damaged right eye today. She is recovering quietly and well at this time and will be cutting back her work hours significantly through the end of the year. 

With the love and support of our entire New Horizons Board of Directors – and --- her many friends and supporters, we anticipate Anastasia's being renewed and recovered in the new year.

Look for future details to find out how you, too, can support Anastasia during this challenging time.

How I Put What Matters To Me Into Motion

6:00 p.m.

All but done with this high pressured day, Part II: Reflections On Why Truth Matters To Me

New Horizons Board Member, Lynn Cullather, and I got into a discussion yesterday on the subject of what is pushing me to carry this plan, originating with me, forward, the Truth Or Dare Movement: Destination Capitol Hill.

Lynn wondered if what I am after is changing the world. 

Not hardly, said I! 

“No such gigantic dream like that for me,” I asserted, as I went on to share what I thought motivates me.

Here are a few of my perspectives on the matter.

• For me truth-seeking, truth-telling and truth-listening bring order out of chaos, peace out of disruption.  That makes them of the highest order, as the alternative is no option at all.

Take a look at how important Congress is making truth-telling or not as a value.

• With this in mind, I realize that I have, along with the strong foundations upon which our organization operates, the expertise, skills and tools to, at least, offer to contribute what I/we can to the social and political chaos proliferating throughout our country through the package of what our Truth Or Dare Movement can provide, once up and fully operational.

I know, as the original architect of our movement, that of which it is comprised, not only makes my life work remarkably well, but that these elements have also made an important contribution to enhancing the lives of hundreds, possibly thousands of others over the past forty-five years of service.  

We have even saved a good hand full of lives in those years.

Our Truth Or Dare GAME has been at the forefront of these gains. 

So why not, at least, make our best effort to offer what we have that has been tried and found true, with the hope of improvement where there is upset, Capitol Hill among other places, with lies, perceived or actual, being the cornerstone of greatest importance at this time.

Again the words of Charles Krauthammer ring in my ears.

You’re betraying your whole life if you don’t say what you think – and you don’t say it honestly and bluntly.

• We are after accomplishing the giving of what we have, in full measure, to the best of our abilities, believing that our Truth Or Dare Movement might, minimally, make a small dent by, at least, furthering discussions on the topic of truth. If meaningful conversation is all we accomplish, it might just be something to prime the fire, something that might impact, later if not sooner.

So it is our obligation to take up this task.

Another truth proclaimed in the Jewish High Holiday prayers suggests that it is asked of us, if we are to be the best of ourselves that –

“We must begin with ourselves, but not end with ourselves.”

• Again New Horizons Truth Or Dare Movement can be an enhanced pathway for doing this, which is why at this time, we are doing everything we can to boost Truth Or Dare capabilities in each and every one of our board members, for starters.  In time, hopefully, these board members will be able to carry our brand of skillfulness out to others in ways that will make a difference.

In fact, among our board members we are already seeing evidence of this from the fruits of our efforts in big and small ways, now that our revitalized Truth Or Dare GAME and its associated GAME community passed its one year anniversary date just last week.

Enough said for today. And just enough to get my remaining four blog posts up before midnight.

Reflections On Why Truth Matters To Me

Along with struggling to, as simply as possible, meet my monthly blog posting quota on this final day of the month, I struggle more than I might ordinarily, as I continue day-after-day this past month, to be "Caught up In Sixes And Sevens.”

On this day -- feeling especially stressed, as I find myself torn between my earthly obligations and those of a higher plane, my Jewish heritage in particular adding to my pressures -- I decide to allow the unfolding day to show me the way through it, rather than me taking control, as best as a human can, to direct the day’s outcome. 

With this commitment, I stayed on this path devotedly, making it an intrinsic part of the very private Rosh Hoshana practice I had created for myself, until 2 p.m. today.

The following are my journaled entries of this day, divided into two parts with the addition of a second article to follow on this theme, coinciding with the idea of there being a Rosh Hoshana Morning Service and an added, later-in-the-day service called Musaf.

Below and also in part two of this themed discussion, are my running commentaries as I attempt to be a “good Jew” and a conscientious blog writer too.

7 a.m.

I wake up early. My first thoughts go directly to four main things: 1. Today is the last day of the month; 2. I still need to write four blog articles before midnight tonight, 3.  It is Rosh Hoshana, the beginning of the Jewish New Year, also called the Ten Days of Repentance or the Ten Days of Awe; and 4. It is my obligation, as a child of my heritage, a Jewish woman, to spend my day in prayer today.

Obviously I must now resolve the dilemma presented here of how I can manage this deadline, in the era of the internet, and be a “good Jew? 

7:20 a.m. 

I decide to put my looming deadlines aside and focus instead on the demands of the holiday, quietly hoping that perhaps the magic and mystery of lifelong, familiar rituals and practices will bring insight with them before my final writing deadline at midnight.

Relieved of immediate pressures, I check in on the news, coming across an interesting article in the Washington Post, by Alia Dastagir titled “It’s been two years since the MeToo movement exploded. Now What?” 

I am drawn into it, especially as it is written in a contemplative style, corresponding to the one in my head.  

In the article the author makes reference to the words of another whose name I have neglected to register. (But will note when I do.) 

Simple words, similar to ones I've expressed myself, reflecting one more of the reasons truth matters. It's the end of the  secrets, their polar opposite.

“It's the secrets that burden you. It's the hiding that burdens you," she said.”

“Yum, I tell myself. 

“There is resonance all around me today. See it’s working – this let go, let G-d pathway I’m choosing for myself today. 

Somehow I'm "doing" Rosh Hoshanah and my writing tasks too, without doing the latter at all.”

8:15 a.m.

I feel prompted to search out astrology predictions on Donald Trump and read a few.

What am I seeking here, I wonder. 

Some kind of alternate reality truth-seeking when, consciously, I am trying to get ready for the holiday?

8:30 a.m.

My mind turns to Rosh Hoshanah, the prayers and rituals established eons ago for this day of a Jew's reflections of the highest order, focused mainly on one's relationship to G-d.

I ask myself what is different about today, for me, from the usual? 

I learned to put myself wholeheartedly into my relationship with Great Mystery, which is not exactly what they call "IT" in the synagogue, the very moment I knew I had lost my eyesight, Labor Day weekend, 1998. 

It was the most sensible thing I could figure out to do at the time. Is there something else I should be doing now? 

My very survival of that ordeal could not have been achieved had I done otherwise, I remind myself. 

Is there a connection, I wonder, that links my survival with “why truth matters?” I ask myself.

Apparently I am still trying to work out my blog writing challenges on my chosen topic, why truth matters to me, as I lean in to Rosh Hoshanah.

9 a.m.  

Rain starts pouring down and my mind shifts to reflecting on the magic and mystery of rain.

I am especially grateful for rain these days. The contrast between last year's flooding and the extensive damages it wrought has shifted, this year, to near drought conditions.

Dependent on our well for water that has shown recent evidence of depletion, I am rejoicing at the abundance of the downpour, anticipating its washing over and nourishing the lingering remnants of my summer garden.

10 a.m. 

I check in again with the Washington Post, finding a beautifully written article, “On Rosh Hashanah, A Note Blown On This Ram’s Horn Will Echo All The Way From Auschwitz" by Chaim Steinmetz. 

The piece centers on the tale of a ram’s horn, called the shofar in Jewish tradition.

Steinmetz writes,

“In synagogues around the country, Jews will gather on Monday for Rosh Hashanah, the New Year holiday. …. A central element during prayer services will be a few simple notes blown on a shofar, a musical instrument fashioned from a ram’s horn and used since ancient times."

The story of this particular shofar which had been cautiously hidden in the death camp is poignant (You can read the entirety here.). Steinmetz continues – 

It would have taken enormous courage for those men to risk their lives by blowing the shofar. Such an act of faith during the war was hardly an isolated episode. A multitude of testimonies describe Jews making steep sacrifices to retain their religious and spiritual identity in the concentration camps. 

This, Steinmetz points out gives testimony to the strength that comes of faith and a dedication to higher "truths" than ordinary earth plane perspectives.

There it is again -- why truth matters.

10:30 a.m.

I do my daily "Morning Joe" check in call tol)ll)FF Sue.

Isabel, our Hood College Truth Or Dare Movement coordinator, and I text back and forth, eventually getting around to canceling our weekly meeting scheduled for today, as she has not been been feeling well.

I think this is just as well on my end. 

I would have needed to take a break from my prayer plans so rescheduling suits me today although I was really looking forward to that meeting that would have updated New Horizons Board and myself on the progress being made at Hood. 

11 a.m.

I situate myself on my living room couch, High Holiday prayer book in hand, readied, at last, to formally begin reading Rosh Hoshana prayers for day one of the Jewish New Year.

I make my start by lighting the ritual candles prior to my reading, taking the liberty to light them at a totally inappropriate time, according to tradition.

I allow myself not to care about "ordained time," choosing instead to honor my personal truth that these candles bring comfort to me at my chosen hour. This is good enough, according to "the G-d of my understanding" who is not all caught up on absolute form, instead respecting that it's the thought that counts.

11:30 a.m.

I turn again to the internet. This time to check out blessings for the holiday. I particularly am drawn to this one, the Shehecheyonu that offers the following prayer.

In Hebrew: Bo-ruch a-toh Ado-noi E-lo-hei-nu me-lech ho-olom she-he-che-ya-nu vi-kee-yi-ma-nu vi-hi-gee-an-u liz-man ha-zeh.

Translation: Blessed are you, L-rd our G d, King of the universe, who has kept us alive and sustained us and let us reach this time

1:00 p.m.

Reading through my holiday prayer book I feel a surge of beauty, a purity of Light energy is surrounding this time of prayer for me.

One passage particularly impacts me --

"It is the greatness of our tradition that ideas derived from our forefathers can teach all generations truths of universal validity, as we...."confront age-old questions.

Followed by these words -- 

"Live with integrity, do what is right, speak the truth without deceit"

Ah ha. This is what it’s about – why truth matters to me!

The answer is very much alive in the ancient teachings of those Beloved ones who went before me, the ancestors of my Jewish heritage.

Added comfort arises as I reflect that these words and ideas are as true of the Christian Bible as they are of the Jewish, corresponding also to Muslim teachings and faith.

2:00 p.m.

I conclude my prayer time, not having written a word to meet my blog demands. 

However, even without effort I have kept myself true to the demands on me for the day while simultaneously, semi-consciously reflecting “On Why Truth Matters To Me,” as I immersed myself in Rosh Hoshanah celebration. 

Nothing wrong about that.

Now without even trying I am able to conjure up blog writing ideas, gleaned from holiday prayers, and move my day forward into accommodating that deadline of mine. 

Words from a favorite journalist, now deceased, Charles Krauthammer crystallize my thoughts further – 

“You’re betraying your whole life if you don’t say what you think…” 

After a half-day spent in ritual contemplation, without writing a word, Rosh Hoshanah has brought me to understand what I probably needed most today, a lesson on“Why Truth Matters To Me.”

Conclusion: 

• I have a passion for truth, a passion I must have developed in lHebrew and Sunday School  -- and -- even more at the knees of my grown-ups, especially from my father's role modeling and the prayers of the Jewish High Holidays. 

How about that!!  That's probably how I got to be just how I am, a woman with a passion for truth. 

Your passion might be football. So be it!

Part I concludes. More to come.

Anastasia's Prophecy Summarized, The Story Behind New Horizons Truth Or Dare Movement

You can read an excerpted summary of my prophecy (or how Anastasia became a Super Sleuth) below with additional comments here and here (though not yet quite clearly described on either of these). 

Anastasia's Prophecy: August 7, 1974

Wikipedia defines “prophecy” as a statement that something will happen in the future or the power or ability to know what will happen in the future. 

The definition fits with what occurred for me on August 7, 1974, the day before Nixon resigned his presidency as a result of the Watergate scandal. The evidence of what this phenomenon brought into my life is what has happened since.

Update, August 11, 2020, today, right now in this present moment, the manifestation of the prophecy, in terms of its instructions for me, is occurring, along with almost magical aspects.

Yippee! I couldn't be happier. I am turning cartwheels happy!!

My Prophecy had two major instructions: 

Instruction One

I was instructed to go forth on an adventure that would guide me to research, understand and develop the skill to transform the Dark Side of Washington society and politics by finding answers to two main questions

Check out Anastasia,
The Super Sleuth
Coaching & Consulting 

Question #1:

How could the President of the United States of America, in good conscience, lie to the American people?

Question #2:

How could so many people believe this lying president, seem to, or simply not care if he/she lied?

Instruction Two

I was directed to someday return to the heart of Washington with the knowledge I would have obtained in answering those twos questions -- and the expertise to put it all to use  to help this country, beginning with Washington society and politics.

My prophecy, as I understand it today, was a “call to adventure”  -- my adventure of a lifetime. 

I have followed the instructions meticulously.

And the time for my return turns out to be NOW!

Caught Up In Sixes and Sevens

Another tale in the continuing saga of what it means for Anastasia to be a Compassionate Warrior Woman (and New Horizons Truth Or Dare Poster Girl), taking on Capitol Hill.

Under construction

It’s two weeks, as of today, since the New Horizons Small “Zones Of Peace” Project officially launched its new initiative, the Truth Or Dare Movement, at the Hood College Community Volunteer And Internship Fair.

I am greatly rewarded by what was accomplished in terms of the event helping us move various key objectives of our budding movement forward.

Yet I had hoped, by this time afterward, I would have found more of a point of clarity, personally, and would feel settled and focused on next steps for myself, as well as for New Horizons. Based on the inroads opening to us from Hood, a giant step of forward motion on our Truth Or Dare mission is already being taken. 

Anticipating multiple other college campus cultures becoming ultimately involved, perhaps as soon as next year, you’d think I’d be celebrating our progress, though only one step so far. Unfortunately, something seems to be holding me down energetically, emotionally and spiritually. 

So far, over the past few weeks, my daily nutrition and stationary bike riding routines have sustained their momentum. 

Yet, overall, disciplining myself, as I usually do: drawing from a complete menu of daily practices to help me do whatever it takes to keep myself on my optimum high road – body, mind and spirit, I have been unable to reach the lift for which I routinely aim. 

From a New Horizons perspective, it seems all is well, progressing as intended: We have properly and successfully presented ourselves at the fair, been rewarded with enthusiastic responses from students and are now, already, in the process of developing our first Truth Or Dare Movement pilot project at Hood College. 

Headed by a vibrant student coordinator named Isabel who is all an organization such as ours could want, our Hood project is almost as good as it can get at this stage. If I won’t be called foolish, I might say of Isabel and “her people” what Murat once said of me, “I might turn cartwheels over how much joy and inspiration Isabel is” herself and for her regular reports on the forward motion of New Horizons Truth Or Dare Movement at Hood College.

Still, here I sit accumulating many hours on this day, doing little else other than writing and re-writing, reading and re-reading my few words, sentences and paragraphs for this relatively short article, feeling lost and confused, a bit like Alice in Wonderland, barely able to put one foot in front of the other with any certainty. 

On a day like today when I am counting down to the end of the month, still with seven blogs needing to be written and published in order to fulfill my monthly commitment of one per week for each of the two main New Horizons sponsored blog sites, this one and the Small “Zones Of Peace” Project site, I am not even having a little fun, much less actual celebrating.

Ordinarily I can -- with the aid of morning meditations that I call my "conversations with G-d," immersing myself in one writing project or another, gardening in my top deck container garden, healthy eating, exercise and connecting with friends -- establish a sense of myself as a co-creator with a Higher Source. 

Once at this level, I can, often without too much trouble – though some mornings are more difficult than others – feel myself slipping into the stream of my life with relative ease.

Not quite there yet for me this round however.

Instead of my being in a meaningful flow from inside myself into the outer world around me I feel jumbled up – and – lost. Betwixt and between, at sixes and sevens, nowhere and everywhere all at the same time.

But wait!! Do not despair, should you be doing so on my behalf!

I may be struggling to feel healthy, happy and celebratory these days, however I can, at least, explain - in fits and starts -- the how, the why and the what of this malaise that has taken me over.

Here an is an introduction, offered to both of us, attempting to explain the turbulence I'm presently experiencing -- an identity crisis of the highest order might be one way of describing it! 

• I am birthing a resurrected me – true to my name Anastasia, meaning she who rises again;
• I am birthing the return cycle of my prophecy (read summary excerpt below);
• I am experiencing a Shaman’s death cycle event!
• I am transforming, going through multiple moments of ego death and rebirth, brought about, at this moment, by –

My heading, full face to the wind, right here and now, after forty-five long, adventurous years, into the final stages of my carrying forth the instructions of my prophecy, a clearly spoken directive that came to me, from where I do not know, on the day before Richard Nixon resigned as President of the U.S.A..!

YAHOO!!!

You can read an excerpted summary of my prophecy below with additional comments here and here (though not yet quite clearly described). 

Anastasia's Prophecy: August 7, 1974

The day before Nixon resigned as President of the United States of America, due to his culpability in the Watergate break-in scandal.

Wikipedia defines “prophecy” as a statement that something will happen in the future or the power or ability to know what will happen in the future. This definition fits with what occurred for me on August 7, 1974, the day before Nixon resigned his presidency as a result of the Watergate scandal. The evidence of what this phenomenon brought into my life is what has happened since.

My Prophecy had two major instructions: 

Instruction One

I was instructed to go forth on an adventure that would guide me to research, understand and develop the skill to transform the Dark Side of Washington society and politics by finding answers to two main questions

Question #1:
How could the President of the United States of America, in good conscience, lie to the American people?

Question #2:
How could so many people believe this lying president, seem to, or simply not care if he/she lied?

Instruction Two

Someday I was directed to return to the heart of Washington with the knowledge I would have obtained in answering those twos questions -- and the expertise to put it all to use  to help this country, beginning with Washington society and politics.

My prophecy, as I understand it today, was a “call to adventure”  -- my adventure of a lifetime. 

I have followed the instructions meticulously.

And the time for my return turns out to be NOW!

Still the return seems to be hurting like Hell and is totally not much fun!

Maybe it will get to be later.

Stay tuned for more, as my adventure of a lifetime begins to sparkle and shine.

Introduction: What It Means To Be A Compassionate Warrior Woman Taking On Capitol Hill

Links to be added

Friday,  Labor Day weekend: The 21st anniversary of the day I lost my eyesight.

Before I realize the significance of today for me, I am awakening trying to explain to myself why I would even think, consider, imagine I would want to put New Horizons and myself in a position to take on the task of taking on Capital Hill!

Whatever could I be thinking?

Trying to put thoughts into words I find myself considering the ONE story I had thought to write earlier in the week that might succinctly account for my making such a bold, brash pledge such as this.

Alongside this contemplation I note that I need to write two more blogs by night’s end of this day: one for the New Horizons Small “Zones of Peace” site and one for this one, in order to wrap up my monthly quota of one post per week for each.

Beginning early tomorrow I take off for the holiday weekend.  So completing my monthly obligation must be now!

What I had wanted to write about was the one, main "back story” of the front story about "What It Means (To Me) To Be A Compassionate Warrior Woman Taking On Capitol Hill," as I thought I knew it.

Then I started scanning a re-run of my past history beginning with that day that changed the course of my life, the day I watched Richard Nixon lie to the Watergate Commission and lots of people seem to believe him though I sure did not!

Upon awakening this morning I initially told myself that the reasoning behind this outrageous Capital Hill plan of mine could be explained by one simple story, maybe two, at the most. An easy accounting of what has brought me to this point. That was before I started reviewing past events more carefully. 

As the veil of sleep fell aside the main “ONE,” I thought, might be about the near-ceaseless debate Marty Groder, my former psychiatrist mentor, and I had had back and forth, like a tennis match volley, throughout the mid-1980s

We were developing our collaboration more and more in those days as I dug deeper and deeper into Marty’s original theories particularly the one about how high leadership individuals and convicts shared the same essential personality structures. This was the one that grabbed me most and probably accounts for much of my devotion to Groder.

How Marty’s theories could explain what had happened in the Watergate scandal, especially the part about Nixon lying and how and why so many seemed to buy his stories was what I needed most to understand. 

Yet understanding my compelling need was way far off in the future and still something I am inclined to ponder on occasion still.

I felt compelled to solve this riddle, heart and soul, like nothing I had ever known before. To solve the mystery, as I viewed it then and be able to someday turn what I believed Groder could teach me back into some kind of gift to Washington would become my driving ambition, next only to my love for my children and my yearning to be the best I could be for them.

It mattered that much!

And, somehow the two ambitions were tied together. But I did not know that until many years later.

The year that stands out most for me in this regard with Marty is 1985. 

President Ronald Reagan is in office and I, a local am having to admit to Marty, an outlier, that times, once again, are turbulent, as they often are in Washington.  

But what does that actually tell us about how Washington society and politics are totally representative of the darkness of humanity that is set in place and irretrievable.
Our debate goes something like this -- 

Marty (“Not always right, but never in doubt”): “Washington is the center of darkness for the entire planet, next only to Moscow!” 

Me, emphatically:  “No, Washington is the center of light, a battleground in the ceaseless war between darkness and light!”

Accustomed as I was to Marty’s Scorpio stinging comments, I cut him a bit of slack in the argument, factoring in that he was a native New Yorker. I could, thus, forgive his one-dimensional view on the subject of the dark side of Washington. 

I, on the other hand, saw Washington with the heart of a Beloved. 

After all, I had come to the nation’s capital just out of college, believing in Kennedy’s Camelot and all I innocently thought it represented.  And though my ideals have many times been disappointed and I had, over the years, physically moved myself further and further away from Washington’s center, I consider myself, to this day, to be a part of it, it a part of me.

For all its faults and no matter who inhabits the White House or Congress, the Washington I see is through the eyes of one who is in love with the town, its many personalities, peculiarities and ups and downs, most especially coming out of the political arena that is the very blood of the town.

Is this the story that explains my reaching for the this sky high achievement upon which I am now embarking? 

Sounds like a love story to me! 

Suggesting that “what it means to me to be taking on Capital Hill” is that I still have faith in the ideals that brought me to Washington so many decades ago and that these are worthy of my belief that collectively we American citizens and politicians can do better than we are showing these days. We have it in us. We always have. 

So I think it’s worth my best efforts and hardest work to fight for these in true Compassionate Warrior Woman-style, meaning fighting for ideals with all the strength, wisdom and love one can muster.

Yet I think this is not “The Story.” 

But it is a part of my story, a snippet, a chapter on the way to my laying out the whole saga, the saga my life has been for the past forty-five years since Nixon’s lying about Watergate, coupled with the prophecy that came to me along with it, altering the course of my life.

So I guess the bottom line for me today is that there is not just one story, not just one simple way to explain "What It Means To Me To Be A Compassionate Warrior Woman Taking On Capitol Hill."

There are many stories behind the front story. 

For example, there is the one about –

• How Nixon’s lying to the American people about Watergate affected me;
• The prophecy that came to me the day Nixon resigned;
• How it came about that Bill Clinton lied about Monica Lewinsky and I went blind;
• Marty and I debating about the dark and light sides of Washington and what that meant to me then and what it means to me today;
• Why I found Obama’s leadership and how people responded to it so disheartening at times, enough for me to create the Possible Human, Possible Society Study;
• And -- OMG! Donald Trump in the White House!

Now, at almost midnight, I am wrapping up what I have to say for August, asserting that I can no longer set my mind to writing the "ONE" story that explains it all.

I have many stories to tell on the subject at hand here. 

I think I’ll tell them, write them and learn from them as I share them. I guess that's what it means to me to be a storyteller.

Maybe then I’ll know more about What It Means(To Me) To Be A Compassionate Warrior Woman Taking On Capitol Hill -- and -- so will you.

Still there always will be more to the telling.

Wishing you all a very pleasant Labor Day holiday!