It Was A Scam! And Not A Scam!

P.S. Anastasia handled her end like the Goddess she aspires to be, without urgency, without reactivity. Always with dignity and studied diplomacy. And almost immediately found a new agency. Beshrt  - Hebrew for destiny!

An adventure in going in a cage with Big Cats -- the Manhattan publishing world to help prepare me for Congress when my time comes,

Or, as my father might have said about this adventure -- "It'll put hair on your chest."

Anastasia Super Sleuth did an excellent job -- ala Sherlock Holmes himself, uncovering the darkness of a ghostwriting/editing New York Times bestsellers agency/firm -- turning a bit of the leaden of ourselves ( Anastasia and Sue) into gold, as we attempted -- unsuccessfully -- to collaboratively write Camelot Disrupted and came out the other end of the deal, minimally a bit more polished for the adventure. At least by a few carats.

Tales -- adventures to recount.

Always "exploring my dark side: the adventure of a lifetime."

Best with my BFF - Sue birthing Black Bear Mountain Village.

She be midwife. I be Momma Bear.

Camelot Disrupted Book Project Jeopardy Being Averted. Oops I Was Wrong. Re-routed Is How It Turned Out.

Quite an adventure!!

Many stories to tell, sooner or later. 

Lessons learned and to be learned. 

Summer Solstice, The Magical Evening Black Bear Mountain Village Was Officially Birthed In Ritual

 Coming soon.

Camelot Disrupted Book Project In Jeopardy

 Details forthcoming.-- perhaps in starts and stops.

The whole story really begins sixty one years ago today when I, Anastasia a.k.a Marcia E, Rosen, began my adventure of becoming a young, innocent bride starting my new life in Washington, D.C. where my new husband and I are intent on being in the aura of the Kennedy's Camelot.

Read my I Came For Camelot series here to begin opening the door to what Camelot Disrupted might mean to me.

In other words I hereby offer my loyal readers a peek into coming attractions.

From Sue deVeer, NH/ZOP Secretary-Treasurer Commenting On...

... her BFF Anastasia's words -- "Can I Stand In Place.."

"Anastasia, when you read me your words,  your way of expressing - "Can I Stand In Place" touched a place in me of hope for the world, as if standing in place was a problem solving option.

Immediately I thought -- Can I really stand still where I am? Even for a moment?

Not compelled to do?

No mantra running through my head, endlessly telling me - "Let's get busy and do this next thing! And do it -- right now!

Your words made me think of you as Meda Rose, your alter ego in Camelot Disrupted, both of YOU as social and political activist role models for me, talking to the trees, listening to their ancient wisdom for guidance, especially in troubled times.

From the 2 of YOU and your words I was taking up the notion that urgency,  busyness and making lots of noise and activity immediately might not be the only ways to go to solve our many crises. Some of us, at least, might do best with long range visioning and planning as you are doing.

Deep quiet and consideration might be wiser at times.

Meda's coined a phrase you often repeated to me this past year to help me through my personal struggles.

Meda Rose calls it her personal Yoda-ism.

"Be first. Do after be."

Anastasia, you and the developing community at our in-progress Black Bear Mountain Village have been trying to help me save my own life this past year, most particularly through our Truth Or Dare GAME and Pandemic Survivors' Support Groups, the former has brought me to look at some hard stuff in myself that I was doing to help create my life's unmanageability (i.e. turns out being a goody goody two shoes, my life script up until now, isn't truly as sweet deep down as it has looked) and the support groups have given me a consistent and secure place to feel safe, understood and cared for.

I had a heartbreak heart attack last year from the fear and consequent stress I was experiencing from family non-Covid medical emergencies, the complications multiplied over many times by the pandemic.

Through it all my Work Horse "survival script" was exacerbating my realities. My instantly activated hypervigilance turning my difficult circumstances plus my way of handling them into my life being unmanageable to the point that my heart gave out on me.

Hundreds of times you reminded me "Be first. Do after BE."

Now your words -- 

"Can I Stand In Place.. on my mountainside, looking down on the valley below" -- gives me a similar pause  -- and comfort. So -- like that old gnarled apple tree that once needed a lift, we are both now standing up straighter and stronger.

A touch of "Lost Hope Regained," the title of the book series we are presently working on with our writing team, with Book One -- Camelot Disrupted now in progress.

(Officially I am Anastasia's scribe and creative collaborator for Camelot Disrupted.)

Respectfully

Susan C. deVeer

Can I Stand In Place?

.Can I stand in place...

...on my mountainside, looking down on the valley below -- as if seeing my entire past to date laid out before me-- with joy and celebration?

I am aiming for this or something better.

I believe I know how to achieve this gentle knowing, this gift of being able to see so far and wide. 

To others, the few that are genuinely aware of how I accomplish my profound experiences of higher consciousness, the gyymbastics I do with my mind, the deep diving into my emotional underworld, always seeking and finding buried treasures, are described as magic.

Sue, my BFF, is particularly observant and sensitive to seeing this in me. 

But -- it is not magic though "magical" it might be. It is something else.

Something, a state of being, I worked very hard emotionally and psychologically, interpersonally and communally to achieve. That I managed my way through this labor to be able now to relax into its rewards, combined days with my having grown into becoming a Shaman, amazes even me at times.

Being blind made a Shaman of me.

It was not on purpose. Until now I resisted truly owning this rewarded attainment of hard work on myself, discipline and determination.

Perhaps most importantly what I have come to be, am becoming, grows from "..the shoulders of the giants" upon which I stand -- my teachers.

First and foremost my father. Next in line -- My Mom -- my stepmother who helped transform my life with her gentle and wise guidance.

I will write more of this -- all of it that I can. And share stories too when the time is right. My stories hopefully inviting back the tales of others.

It is important that I give this information to you. Especially if -- you are struggling but courageous enough to yearn for something better, especially through this turbulent and scary time of the pandemic --  and open to facing hard facts and feelings. Then you may find what I have to share to be of my particular importance for you. 

Possibly even a lifeline. 

This suggestion is not intended to mean I/we are in the lifesaving business/ But we do have some expertise here to guide a dedicated traveler or two on life's twists and turns. But only for the most dedicated and determined.

More to come. More to share as I -- at last -- begin my preparations for the "return of my prophecy." And what it will mean. Certainly for me.

And maybe for you.

Fifty years in the planning! Can you believe that? I barely can!

Can I stand in place and see all of this? Know these things I know?

Apparently so!